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Heavilin Herald
February 10, 2004
Each year, a friend of mine writes her daughter Sari a letter on Sari's death date. I decided to do the same this year, so I am writing an open letter to Nate.
Dear Nate,
It has been twenty-one years since I have been able to give you a hug and tell you I love you. I still miss you terribly, but let me tell you what has happened in the past twenty-one years. Your brother, Matt, married Debbie, one of your best friends. They have been married almost twenty years. They have three kids, Kate, Nate, and Caleb. You would have so much fun with them. Nate looks like you and acts a lot like you. He is Mr. Cool and never gets too rattled no matter what is going on around him.
Mike and Mellyn have been married almost twenty-two years and have a delightful son, Christian, who is a computer whiz like your brother Matt.  Christian's voice reminds me of you. All of the grands are musical and are doing very well in school.
Your dad and I are retired. Can you believe that? I sure don't feel old enough to be retired, but we are really enjoying this life.
Our lives changed drastically when you died. We were introduced to a world we really didn't want to know about. I started writing books. Can you believe that?  Your mother is a writer! Dad and I have met and encouraged thousands of bereaved parents in the past twenty-one years. Nate, we walk into situations that we previously would have run from.  You see, when a child dies, I know what to do. On this day, February 10, 2004, our friends Brian and Melissa are burying their little girl, Sydney. She was born still. I was able to talk to them on the phone today, and I think I was able to encourage them.  I know what to say and what not to say because we have been there. We know because of you. I just wanted you to know that you are still having an influence on this earth even though you have been gone for twenty-one years.
I love you and miss you.

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